I slept one hour last night. Fern was restless and after I woke up at 11pm, I was too. I couldn’t get back to sleep, and kept hearing weird sounds. Leo wouldn’t lie down and his toenails were tapdancing in circles for 2 hours before I finally gave in and took him for a walk. In my bathrobe. At 2am. Then he finally chilled out after I unceremoniously pushed him off the bed once we got home. And then Fern woke up. And then Fern woke up. And then Fern woke up. And then…
Yesterday I took the most exquisite pictures of Fern in a bunny hat against a backdrop of Calla Lilies. I put the camera back in my bag (I remember doing it!) where it remained all day. It was Jeff’s camera. This morning the camera is nowhere to be found. I swear I’m cursed or being followed around by a thieving sprite, because this kind of bewildering disappearance of material things happens to me all the time. Jeff is trying not to be blaming but it’s kinda obvious that he thinks I suck right now.
Just now my mom called to tell me that someone dear to my heart, an important figure from childhood, died last night. Not a total surprise, and he had a full life, but I still feel heartbroken and am wondering if in some way this is related to why I couldn’t sleep last night.
Blogging every day has been getting difficult when I forget to document our lives with photography, and now we don’t have a camera, so…I can take the occasional photo with my phone, but until we get the real deal, my posts on here may be more sporadic for a while. I have been feeling like I need a little break anyway, so this might be a good time. I will still be writing every morning, I won’t be totally gone, just perhaps not so consistent.
Here’s looking at you.