Dear New Home,
We are still looking for you. Maybe you don’t realize how much it is we want to find you. Please don’t be discouraged by the way we remain invested and rooted where we are. It is important for us to continue to thrive while we search for the cradle of our dreams.
Please don’t be confused by my love affairs either. It is true…who wants to be involved with someone who’s heart is already taken? But I truly can’t help it…I have stomping grounds and I know a place in the world that knows me just as well. My veins match the pattern of oak trees against twilight and the meadowlarks in Shasta County sang me into being…it’s just the way it is.
But that doesn’t mean that there isn’t room in me to love MORE. Maybe you, new, dear, found home will be like a second child…cherished and adored just as much as the first, yet differently.
We need you. All the creatures that want to live in and around you need you too. Another Spring is going by, and in my mind’s eye I see a whole brood of chicks who will not know your grasses and there are bees that hum in the imaginal realm, just waiting for their chance to taste your flowers.
We need you because our beautiful life in the city sometimes feels like purgatory. Beautiful, but illusory, with a strange deja vu sense of doing the same fruitless things over and over. We try to keep up the fertility, but this little puddle is getting kinda anaerobic.
I feel you out there and sometimes I think you are sad too. Are you waiting for us? We can’t wait to arrive, bringing nothing less than the expectation of magic. We will heal you, we will tend you and we hope you will do the same for us.
There are a lot of charlatans, homes that try to lure us in, but leave our hearts empty. We will know you when we find you, we will know each other. We will KNOW. We don’t expect perfection, but we do expect resonance and really can’t settle for anything less.
I will admit, the level of our hope-o-meter is going down. When this happens, we begin to entertain other, more dire and drastic ideas that seem to leave everyone pretty miserable. So we continue to wait, and I will tie this message onto the leg of one of the distracted and girl chasing finches. Looking for love, that’s what spring is all about. And dear home of our dreams…we are looking for YOU.
Mary, Jeff and Fern